Just Another Day in Samarra

18 Feb 05:

We had just finished visiting a school with White Platoon in order to see if the principal needed any funds for supplies and everyone was loaded up in the HMMWV to drive away.  We started moving south when we heard a loud explosion that rocked our vehicle.  My gunner was momentarily blinded from the dust and smoke that was kicked up and all of our ears were ringing.  I told my driver to drive about fifty yards out of the immediate area and then I got on the radio and asked the Bradley Fighting Vehicle (BFV) behind us if he saw what the explosion was.  He said an unseen insurgent had lobbed a grenade over a wall to our east and a squad was being dismounted to clear the building.  It was common for insurgents to try and lob grenades into the gunner's hatch of HMMWVs and thankfully this guy missed and it landed beside our truck.  Our vehicle had a flat left rear tire and the rear window on that side had a few pock marks, but everything else was fine.  They didn’t catch the insurgent who threw the grenade, but I was thankful that my crew was okay.      

An Expensive Alarm

FYI...This is simply cut and paste from the document.

23 May 05:

Two VBIEDs and one suicide bomber wearing an explosive vest hit the patrol base in a coordinated attack.  I was woken up by a loud explosion around 0600.  I jumped out of bed and was instantly gagging on dust that had been kicked up by the explosion.  About twenty seconds later, another larger explosion rocked the patrol base and blew almost every door in the building off its hinges, including ours.  Maybe fifteen seconds later, another explosion went off, but this one wasn’t as large as the others.  It rattled the walls a little, but that was it.  I was sleeping in my DCU pants, so I quickly threw on my boots and ran to the CP.  The hallway in between our room and the CP was filled with dust and smoke, but I could still see okay.  The CP was a complete mess.  The sandbags on the window had been blown down and there were glass shards all over the floor.  Power was out in the patrol base since the blasts had taken place about thirty yards from the two massive generators behind the compound.  The two radio monitors on duty were still dazed from the explosion.  Chairs were knocked over, papers that were previously organized on desks were strewn all over the floor, and the dust was so thick that it was difficult to breathe.  I ran to the room next to the CP, which is where all my Soldiers slept, and found them getting all their gear on to go man previously planned battle positions on the perimeter of the patrol base.  I ran back to my room, threw on my flak vest and ACH, and then headed for the roof for a better view of the damage.  The roof was crowded with Soldiers taking up battle positions dressed in flak vest, ACH, and whatever clothing they were sleeping in when the attack occurred.  I made my way to the southeast corner of the roof and looked down at the carnage that lay below.  The first bongo truck loaded with explosives had used the neighborhood south of the patrol base as cover to get as close to the T-wall barriers as possible.  It detonated about ten feet from the wall and knocked down twelve of the T-walls.  The second explosive laden dump truck was close behind the first, but the roof guard quickly recovered from the first blast and opened fire on the second truck.  The driver detonated the VBIED about twenty yards from the perimeter once he started taking fire.  This was the blast that provided the most force because the truck was loaded with over 800 lbs of explosives (according to EOD).  The black smoke and dust was so thick that the roof guard, SPC Burgos, could not see anything, so he simply fired into the security breach created by the first VBIED.  The suicide bomber was supposed to run through the breach into the barracks and detonate his explosive vest, killing as many Soldiers as possible.  However, the roof guard’s suppressive fire struck him as he ran through and he detonated his vest when he had made it about five feet inside the perimeter.  Body parts and internal organs from the suicide bomber and the VBIED drivers were strewn around the area.  LT Pelletier had a large pile of intestines fly through his window and land at the foot of his bed.  There was no doubt that the actions of the SPC Burgos saved the lives of multiple Soldiers.  The first blast blew him back inside the bunker and he wasn’t able to see anything when he recovered.  His quick decision to fire blindly into the security breach resulted in the second VBIED detonating outside of the patrol base.  He was also knocked to the ground by the blast from the second VBIED, but he recovered once again and continued firing in time to hit the suicide bomber.  M88’s were quickly employed to lift the T-wall barriers back into place and more fortifications were added to the outer wall to withstand future attacks.  Several walls in the patrol base were cracked from the force of the explosions and the sandbags on every window were knocked down.  The cracked walls were unfixable, but all the sandbags were immediately replaced.  Engineers visited the patrol base and said the structure was still strong enough to withstand multiple explosions, so we acted like we had a choice and continued using the complex.  This proved to be true when three mortars scored a direct hit on the roof of the patrol base about two months later with no major damage or casualties. 

Finding Comfort in Past Turmoil

When I redeployed from my first tour in Iraq in late December of 2005, I had a lot of mixed feelings about what I had been through.  To be completely honest, I was mad at God for allowing some of the things that I witnessed to even happen.  God had blessed me with a beautiful wife and child, but I felt cursed from the things in Iraq that I retained in my head.  When Leigh, Meg, and I went to Monterey, CA for grad school, it was a much needed break from another deployment and we were truly blessed to be given the opportunity.  However, among other things, I remember that I still couldn't stand to be around loud noises and especially fireworks.  On the 4th of July, I would listen to my mp3 player late into the night to drown out anything that resembled gunfire or small explosions.  Additionally, I was still very pessimistic about God's will and how some scenes of death were able to fit in his plan.  A couple months after the NPS academic year started, I was invited to a men's Bible study led by Bob Reehm, a man in the Navigators who dedicated his life to bringing people to Christ and also helping fellow believers to regain their focus.  Eventually, I was able to discuss my inner turmoil with Bob and he recommended that I write down all the close calls I had in Iraq and to use them as a testimony of how God was watching over me.  The macho side of me kept saying that thousands of Soldiers had gone through tougher situations so I was not going to feel sorry for myself.  I know for a fact that I was one of the guys on PB Uvanni in Samarra that had it easier than most.  Infantry platoons went out on combat patrols everyday for up to 12 hours a day while I would join them for a portion of that time based on my own tasks...so who was I to have pity on myself?!  However, Bob finally convinced me to type up some of the past events on my computer.  To my surprise, the venting helped a little bit and, through God's grace, I began to cope with the situation.  
Fast forward almost six years and I found that document in my external hard drive while on my third deployment.  Based on the timing, it was a sense of comfort that came over me as I was reminded of how God had protected me in the past and I believe he will this time as well.  I came to terms with death a while ago when I was finally able to place my complete faith in God and his will for me.  Now I only fear death for those around me who do not know Christ.
My next three blog posts will include some of the stories that Bob convinced me to write about, but I will not post the blog to facebook afterward.  This is not something that really applies to the hundreds of facebook friends that I have only seen in the fickle online world, but mainly for those who know how my life has changed for the better ever since I truly placed my faith in God.  The future is as bright as ever! 

Competition

So I was standing in the Command Post (CP) today and one of my Soldiers walked up to me and asked,"Sir, what did you score on the run?"  We have an Army Physical Fitness Test (APFT) coming up a couple days before I change command which means everyone in the battery has one last chance to beat me.  I thrive on competition and I have tried to instill a competitive spirit in my battery as well.  I told the Soldier my run time from the previous APFT and he still wasn't done with his questions..."And what about the pushups Sir?" He continued to ask for my scores on each event and once he tallied them up in his head, he looked at me with a smirk on his face before declaring, "I'm going to beat you Sir."  I gave him a confident look (I hope it looked that way) and said, "I hope you do beat me, but I'm not going to just let you."  That Soldier does not even have a score in the top ten in the battery, but I have a confession to make.  It made me nervous.  Is he doing some kind of insane training that I am not aware of?  What does he know that I don't?  And this is why I love a competitive environment...no matter how well I did on the last APFT or what my physical standing is in the battery, I always feel like someone is on my heels.  I am usually the last person to talk any trash, but I welcome it when my Soldiers talk trash to me.  I have less time during the day to train than my Soldiers, but one thing is for sure, that comment today will help me to focus during the time that is available.  I just wish I was this competitive with academics, wait a second...no I don't.